We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Randomize