u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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