The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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