; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
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