question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize
