Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Randomize
