he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
His hands were made for my vagina.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
