the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
