Where are you?
In a non slutty way
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
