Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
