I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Randomize