He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Randomize