Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
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He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize