I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
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