Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
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