no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize
