You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize