Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Floor bacon is actually really good
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
