i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Randomize
