I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Randomize
