hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize