There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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