never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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