There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
