are you still at the devil's house?
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
