I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
