If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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