i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
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