I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize
