On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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