would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
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