Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
If that was your dad, he is hot
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
