um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
