with your own penis?
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
