Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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