Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Randomize
