My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
