so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
