I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
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