i would punch a child for taco bell
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
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