I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
