remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize