Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
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I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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