The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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