I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
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