Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Randomize
