we're blogging at a bar
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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