Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
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