I heard we made out
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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