So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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